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How bad was the Cincinnati Bengals’ disgraceful performance in their 20-0 week one loss? Bengals backer Mike Goodpaster’ll certainly tell you…

1) Ken Zampese is Bob Bratkowski all over again
Sure, the offensive line is pathetic, but Zampese’s play-calling does not help matters. This team has no true identity: Are they a running team? A passing team? Nobody knows and, sad to say, the offensive coordinators can’t answer this question either. Zampese’s dad Ernie was a great NFL coach and, as we have seen in the past, just because you are an NFL coach, it doesn’t mean you are a good coach. Too often “NFL” stands for “Nepotism Football League” and Zampese is an example of this. He is an outstanding QBs coach but in no way is Zampese an offensive coordinator.

2) The Offensive Line is the worst in the NFL
Whoever wanted to waste a first-round draft pick on Cedric Ogbuehi should be fired immediately. Ogbuehi is so bad he makes Andre Smith look like a solid player. Offensive line coach Paul Alexander said that if Ogbuehi, Fisher, and center Russell Bodine didn’t work out, he would take the blame. Well here you go, Mr. Alexander! I would call him Coach, but that’s a smack in the face to anyone that is a “real” coach. The game could have been different if Whitworth were playing left tackle and Kevin Zeitler were playing guard, but they weren’t because Alexander thought he had drafted their replacements and of course he *hasn’t*! Mike Brown likes to save money so maybe by putting Alexander and Zampese on the bus home together, he can get a two-for-one deal.

3) A.J. McCarron is not the answer
McCarron would fare worse than Andy Dalton behind this line – if that’s possible! A.J. was 2-3 as a starting QB a couple of years ago and has proven time and time again that he is unable to read a defense at an NFL level. Dalton, just like every QB, needs time and an offensive coordinator; he has neither right now in Cincinnati.

4) The Bengals play with *no* passion
Maybe when they get Vontaze Burfict back he can help, but as of right now this team plays uninspired football. This falls on head coach Marvin Lewis who as a head coach is as soft as it gets. Yes, we can get a three-for-one on the bus and send Lewis with Alexander and Zampese.

5) The defense played well
If I had told you the Bengals would give up only 20 points yesterday, you would have taken it. The secondary looks much improved; Pac Man Jones and Shawn Williams will be back to make it even stronger.

6) The schedule makes a decent season doable
The schedule is as soft and uninspired as the Bengals, so all is not lost yet – but with Marvin Lewis at the helm, I don’t see this team really fighting to save their season, do you…?

7) Bengals Fans are desensitized and have given up
10,000 unsold tickets for opening day in the NFL? On top of this, the Cincinnati crowd was quiet from the start of the game; who’s fault is this? Mike Brown and Marvin Lewis’s: Just like the team, it’s hard for fans to be inspired by two soft men who have no clue how to get the job done.

8) Marvin Lewis at some point will be fired
Maybe a disgraceful loss to the Houston Texans and a long week to prepare for the next game would finally do Marvin Lewis in? Probably not, and if it did, the Bengals would probably make assistant head coach Paul Alexander the interim head coach and that would be worse than Lewis. The most likely outcome is that the uninspired Bengals struggle through a 5- or 6-win season and then Marvin steps down.

9) We should all start cutting the grass on Sundays
Do your chores for the wife on Sundays, and don’t watch this train wreck of an organization. Do I say that because I think if we all did that Mike Brown would change? HELL NO! He will never change, but at least we as fans won’t be wasting our Sundays on this.

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